On October 30th, 2021 I had a stroke. By the grace of God I did not experience any visible damage or permanent disabilities that we know of. While resting, a well respected supportive friend, Rosalind Lewis; a wife, mother, military retiree, former police officer, teacher, cancer survivor, stepper and better half of a Power Couple shared this advice with me. So instead of my usual advice column, I decided to share her advice with you. Hopefully this will help you age gracefully and cheerfully.
Relax and read, TBT
Dear Relax and Read,
Between now and death. It’s time to use the money you saved up. Use it and enjoy it. Don’t just keep it for those who may have no notion of the sacrifices you made to get it. Remember there is nothing more dangerous than a son or daughter-in-law with big ideas for your hard-earned capital.
Warning: This is also a bad time for investments, even if it seems wonderful or fool-proof. They only bring problems and worries. This is a time for you to enjoy some peace and quiet.
Stop worrying about the financial situation of your children and grandchildren, and don’t feel bad spending your money on yourself. You’ve taken care of them for many years, and you’ve taught them what you could. You gave them an education, food, shelter, and support. The responsibility is now theirs to earn their own money.
Maintain a healthy life, without great physical effort. Do moderate exercise (like walking every day), eat well, and get your sleep. It’s easy to become sick, and it gets harder to remain healthy. So keep yourself in good shape and be aware of your medical and physical needs. Keep in touch with your doctor, do tests even when you’re feeling well. Stay informed.
- Always buy the best, most beautiful items for your significant other. The key goal is to enjoy your money with your partner. One day one of you will miss the other, and the money will not provide any comfort then, enjoy it together now.
Don’t stress over the little things. You’ve already overcome so much in your life. You have good memories and bad ones, but the important thing is the present. Don’t let the past drag you down and don’t let the future frighten you. Feel good in the now. Small issues will soon be forgotten.
Regardless of age, always keep love alive. Love your partner, love life, love your family, and love your neighbor. Remember, “A man is not old as long as he has intelligence and affection.”
ABC: Always be Cute. Don’t stop going to your hair salon or barber. Do your nails, go to the dermatologist and the dentist.
Wear your perfumes and oils daily. When you are well-maintained on the outside, it seeps in your soul, making you feel proud and strong on the inside.
Don’t lose sight of fashion trends, but keep your own sense of style. You’ve developed your own sense of what looks good on you – keep it and be proud of it. It’s part of who you are.
ALWAYS stay up-to-date. Read newspapers, watch the news. Go online and read what people are saying. Make sure you have an active email account and try to use some of those social networks. You’ll be surprised at what old friends you’ll meet.
Respect the younger generation and their opinions. They may not have the same ideas as you, but they are the future and will take the world in their direction. Give advice, not criticism, and try to remind them that yesterday’s wisdom still applies today.
Never use the phrase: “In my time.” Your time is now. As long as you’re alive, you are part of this time. Some embrace their golden years, while others become bitter and surly. Life is too short to waste your days on the latter.
Spend your time with positive, cheerful people, it’ll rub off on you and your days will seem that much better. Spending your time with bitter people will make you feel older and harder to be around.
Do not surrender to the temptation of living with your children or grandchildren (if you have a financial choice, that is). Sure, being surrounded by family sounds great, but we all need our privacy. They need theirs and you need yours. Even then, do so only if you feel you really need the help or do not want to live by yourself
Don’t abandon your hobbies. If you don’t have any, make new ones. You can travel, hike, cook, read and dance. You can adopt a cat or a dog, grow a kitchen garden, play cards, checkers, chess, dominoes, golf.
Try to get out of the house regularly.Meet friends you haven’t seen in a while, experience something new (or something old). The important thing is to leave the house from time to time. Go to museums, go walk through a park. Just get out there.
Speak in courteous tones and try not to complain or criticize too much unless you really need to. Try to accept situations as they are.
Pains and discomfort go hand in hand. Try not to dwell on them, moving through pain is a part of living.
If you’ve been offended by someone – forgive them. If you’ve offended someone-apologize. Don’t drag around resentment with you. It only serves to make you sad and bitter. It doesn’t matter who was right. Someone once said: “Holding a grudge is like taking poison and expecting the other person to die.” Don’t take that poison. Forgive, forget, and move on with your life.
Laugh and Dance often
There are always comedy shows attend one or watch one on TV, We all have heard laughter heals
Dance every chance you get. Dancing is more fun than exercise.
Remember, you are one of the lucky ones.. Many never get to this age, never get to experience a full life. You managed to have a life, a long one
My valued friends, enjoy a peaceful life at this point in your life ...
Don’t worry... be happy.
Power Couples Creed
Power Couples are upbeat couples who are visible in the community doing positive things.
Power Couples implement positive change and their community is a better place because of them.
Power Couples play different roles in their communities, some work with children and others with adults.
Power Couples are sometimes entrepreneurs, stepping out on Faith making it happen, creating jobs and opportunities for others.
Power Couples are oftentimes the lenders, and not the borrowers, it has nothing to do with how much money they make but everything to do with being a good shepherd with what God has given them.
Power Couples may be decision makers who hold executive positions and are responsible for the livelihood of others.
Power Couples are helpful and people have a tendency to come to them in times of trouble for advice and encouragement.
Power Couples make a personal decision to walk a positive walk.
Power Couples are not perfect. They are not immune to trials and tribulations and some temptations. They may have made some mistakes and bad decisions in their past but that does not define them.
Power Couples press forward and learn from their mistakes,
because they know they are stronger together than they are apart.